Kim Riener

My name is Kim tender (tender is the name God gave me recently)! I grew up fatherless because my dad left us at Christmas for another woman when I was almost 6 years of age! After his departure, my mom was severely shaken in her emotions. So I slipped into the role of a mother as a child. Taking care of her at such a young age, resulted in losing sight of my own wounds and profound pain trapped deep inside my heart. My parents were non-believers, but my mother wanted a good school for me so she sent me to “private school”. I spent my school days in a catholic school, which was a horrible experience! Sadly at 9 years of age I started suffering from an eating disorder called anorexia. It was almost severe to the brink of death. After that I became very rebellious when I was a teenager, I aspired to be strong and master my own life by myself, I thought if I make money and take care of myself and of my mom then, I am perhaps not a burden. However this decision ended in a complete disaster.

With various incidents of sexual abuse, death threats, racket, theft, reinforcement, brawls, cheating, fornication, posing for porn images featured in sex magazines (they named me Kim Dragon (which I tattooed on my belly), dancing in strip clubs for 11 years, I did it all. Once at an erotic fair, I encountered a drunken man who told me I looked like a transvestite. The words he spoke had great impact on me and my self-identity. I believed him and affirmed the lie that I was not a real woman. Sex for money? Thank god only 1 time that I had sex for money) but partying, alcohol problems, false identity, panic attacks, severe depression, schizophrenic tendencies, epileptic seizures also resulted in several stays at psychiatric clinics! Overwhelmed with guilt and shame I tattooed nearly all of my body to cover up what I felt had become, disgusting dirt! All this in the process of living with same-sex attraction for 17 years! At 30 years old I became terrified of the life that I lived. So I decided to end it and planned my suicide over for days, as I thought this was the ONLY way out! I had searched far and wide for the true meaning of life. Dabbling in the occult for years in new-age exercises which I strongly practised, manipulation and thought control… Attempted self-healing but failed.

” In the moment I wanted to end my life God saved me and gave me real life out of his amazing grace, I could not believe that he wanted a wretch like me! “

From this moment on I was a new creation in HIM, he healed me restored me set me totally free from same-sex attraction and I am radically saved and deeply loved, from darkness into light forever and eternity I want to be a vessel for the Lord… Now I know what true life means. There is only one way, one truth and one life it’s Jesus Christ himself!

 

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