In my 6th form year, I went to a Christian camp for the first time and felt all the usual pain of not being confident in doing sport. Others saw this and it grieved me. When I said goodbye to the speaker, he hugged me – probably the first time this had happened and was something that touched me deeply. It was as though I realised that men after all did have feelings, could be gentle and were sometimes loving. This wasn’t a sexual thing at all.
That night alone, I know I met the living God in repentance – and “walked on water” for many months. But the day came when I had to admit that my homosexual feelings were still there – despite my conversion. So began a long walk towards the freedom I craved.